Steve Jobs will show us the proper way to hold the iPhone.
Apple will single out Brian Lam and say “this is why we can’t have nice things … or at least test phones.”
They will give out free Bumpers to everyone, but they will be of the “purple polka-dot bikini” variety.
Apple will blame AT&T saying, “their More Bars; More Places” advertising campaign was behind the code that was overly generous on reporting signal strength.
Steve Jobs will say, “It’s not a big deal. People just don’t use phones anymore”
